I don't feel like I have much to write that is anywhere near profound, but I am determined. One of the things you learn in writing is to always plan out our essay; your beginning, middle, and end. Well, for now, I will not be doing that. I just want to "put thoughts to pen and paper," so to speak.
All last night I dreamt of California; how much I missed it. I'm sure it's just a bad case of nostalgia, but I woke up thinking, how can I make this happen. I thought about my dad, will he leave me his house in Pearblossom to me? Not likely, but I could imagine, living in Pearblossom, Vance being a pastor at one of those weird little churches and really shaking things up. Then, reality set in. I'm in the middle of building a house, a mansion really. We are going to be here till we die. My life in California was over a long time ago. That realization makes me so sad. I still want to take the kids to Disneyland in the very near future.
About the house...it's 5000 square feet of decision making. Bigger than anything I could have ever imagined in my wildest dreams. I pray that we stay in budget and do not have a huge monthly payment at the end of things. For now, I'm making the decision of fireplaces. We have three and they are all different. Mom will have a gas fireplace in her apartment. I was thinking about having a regular open fireplace in the great room, and a wood burning stove in the basement.
The kids: poor Tristan has caught whatever I had that turned into Bronchitis. I'm going to keep him out of school today. After school Morgan picks up her new glasses. She is so smart. Kael, Rachie, and Will are all well, but I worry about their abilities to focus and will need to come up with a way to help them with that. My first thought is to turn of the T.V. and the video games. I am almost positive those things are turning their brains to mush.
That is it for now. I'm actually going to try to get in some devotion time today.
Monday, November 10, 2014
Saturday, November 8, 2014
Starting over...
It's been a very long time since I have put my thoughts on anything; paper, computer, blog...
Before the fire, I would journal constantly. I had been journaling since age nine and had many that I kept and looked through occasionally. I even had some of my mother's journals and thoughts she had written. All of it was burned in the fire. Subconsciously, I guess I feel, "What's the point?" Everything on this earth is temporary, why write anything down to keep. In fact, why save anything at all? I really don't think I purposely thought these thoughts, but the effect of having them somewhere in my mind has kept me from journaling and, in some cases, even taking pictures and videos. I have very few pictures and videos and thoughts of the children in this last year and half. I have decided, that even if it is all destroyed, I will enjoy all these things for as long as I will be allowed to keep them.
So, my New Year's resolution (2 months in advance) is to document and write my thoughts. We just started building our house. I will document that.
Since I'm here, I want to record the joy I just felt listening to Kael sing "God Bless Us Everyone" an octave higher than the vocalist on the recording. It sounded absolutely beautiful and filled my heart and soul. And that happened just now. I know I would forget that if I hadn't written it. What a beautiful and terrible life we have.
I really hope I can remember to share everything with myself and whomever may read this now or in the future.
Before the fire, I would journal constantly. I had been journaling since age nine and had many that I kept and looked through occasionally. I even had some of my mother's journals and thoughts she had written. All of it was burned in the fire. Subconsciously, I guess I feel, "What's the point?" Everything on this earth is temporary, why write anything down to keep. In fact, why save anything at all? I really don't think I purposely thought these thoughts, but the effect of having them somewhere in my mind has kept me from journaling and, in some cases, even taking pictures and videos. I have very few pictures and videos and thoughts of the children in this last year and half. I have decided, that even if it is all destroyed, I will enjoy all these things for as long as I will be allowed to keep them.
So, my New Year's resolution (2 months in advance) is to document and write my thoughts. We just started building our house. I will document that.
Since I'm here, I want to record the joy I just felt listening to Kael sing "God Bless Us Everyone" an octave higher than the vocalist on the recording. It sounded absolutely beautiful and filled my heart and soul. And that happened just now. I know I would forget that if I hadn't written it. What a beautiful and terrible life we have.
I really hope I can remember to share everything with myself and whomever may read this now or in the future.
Wednesday, April 24, 2013
Thursday, March 29, 2012
VisionWriters
I have revisited my VisionWriters journal and I thought I would share. Although, as usual this is more for me than for anyone else. I just do not want to forget.
Monday, March 26, 2012
Rachel,
Without faith (the hope in something unseen and unproven) it is impossible (you just cannot) please Me. For if you really want to know Me and know my ways and my thoughts you have to believe that I exist, but not only that, you need to believe that I care for you, that I love You, that I want the best for you. You have to believe ALL this, PLUS diligently seek me. Put me first, put all the ifs, ands and buts out of your mind and focus on the truth of My Word and sacrifice more of your time. Five minutes here and there is not going to cut it - that is not the definition of "diligent." Then, when you do this I will reward you with the answers you seek - the ones you really need and do not even know how to ask for. Test me in this.
Monday, March 26, 2012
Rachel,
Without faith (the hope in something unseen and unproven) it is impossible (you just cannot) please Me. For if you really want to know Me and know my ways and my thoughts you have to believe that I exist, but not only that, you need to believe that I care for you, that I love You, that I want the best for you. You have to believe ALL this, PLUS diligently seek me. Put me first, put all the ifs, ands and buts out of your mind and focus on the truth of My Word and sacrifice more of your time. Five minutes here and there is not going to cut it - that is not the definition of "diligent." Then, when you do this I will reward you with the answers you seek - the ones you really need and do not even know how to ask for. Test me in this.
Monday, March 26, 2012
BIG WEEK
It's a big week this week. First, I'm focusing on reorganizing the house. I guess you could call that spring cleaning. The nice thing about this week is that I don't have to worry about drop offs, pick ups or homework. But, in place of that we have The Thorn which will take place this weekend and Glen has to be down at the World Arena almost everyday this week.
Since it is Spring Break there are some thoughts to do with the kiddos. Roller skating, the zoo, the park for a picnic, the library and swimming at Villa. I would like to try to really have fun with them, but it needs to be planned out to the minute. I also need to plan out all my set lists and figure out drivers for the Thorn practices (work is going to get in the way of this week a little bit).
Then I need to set the plans for church events and buy palms for Palm Sunday and set a practice for Easter Sunday and just make sure everything is in place for a really marvelous Resurrection Sunday. Lord, I ask for your favor, wisdom and brilliant creativity. These really only come from you.
Since it is Spring Break there are some thoughts to do with the kiddos. Roller skating, the zoo, the park for a picnic, the library and swimming at Villa. I would like to try to really have fun with them, but it needs to be planned out to the minute. I also need to plan out all my set lists and figure out drivers for the Thorn practices (work is going to get in the way of this week a little bit).
Then I need to set the plans for church events and buy palms for Palm Sunday and set a practice for Easter Sunday and just make sure everything is in place for a really marvelous Resurrection Sunday. Lord, I ask for your favor, wisdom and brilliant creativity. These really only come from you.
Monday, March 19, 2012
New Worship Blog
Take a look at my new worship blog. I will be posting the set lists and a little devotional every week. I would love to have your feedback. www.gatewaybfcworship.blogspot.com
Sunday, March 11, 2012
THANK YOU
I have to send out a big "thank you"! Our family recently went on a ski break to Beaver Creek and we really did have a wonderful time. Everyone had the opportunity to ski.
When I sat down to really think about it, this trip was impossible. We really didn't have the money to do it. We didn't have the time and we didn't have the energy. God is the God of the impossible. Things were orchestrated in such a way that He "provided" for the blessing.
We have always chosen to go on this trip whether the kids were in school or not. We would never choose Spring Break simply because the slopes are too crowded. This year, however, worked out perfectly because the kids all had testing in their schools the week we returned giving them a full week to catch up on their homework. Praise God!
I would not have been able to go on this trip if it were not for 4 ladies who stepped up and subbed all my classes at Villa Sport. A bonus was that my students missed me. A little absence does make the heart grow fonder. Also, the Garcia family and Jarrod L. stepped up and led worship for me at church. Pastor Derek and Ferris Cox stepped in to preach for Vance. Aunt Gwen joined us on the trip so we all could get a little more skiing in. She also cleaned the kitchen at our condo every day, twice per day. The week before we left she came and cleaned our house several times so I could focus on the enormous task of packing clothes, skis, gear, etc. for 9 people - plus food for an entire week.
It is evident that we could not have had this wonderful family time without the help of so many. It is encouraging to see how blessed we really are. Family and friends around us are essential to this life. THANK YOU!!!
To see photos and video of our trip look me up on Facebook.
When I sat down to really think about it, this trip was impossible. We really didn't have the money to do it. We didn't have the time and we didn't have the energy. God is the God of the impossible. Things were orchestrated in such a way that He "provided" for the blessing.
We have always chosen to go on this trip whether the kids were in school or not. We would never choose Spring Break simply because the slopes are too crowded. This year, however, worked out perfectly because the kids all had testing in their schools the week we returned giving them a full week to catch up on their homework. Praise God!
I would not have been able to go on this trip if it were not for 4 ladies who stepped up and subbed all my classes at Villa Sport. A bonus was that my students missed me. A little absence does make the heart grow fonder. Also, the Garcia family and Jarrod L. stepped up and led worship for me at church. Pastor Derek and Ferris Cox stepped in to preach for Vance. Aunt Gwen joined us on the trip so we all could get a little more skiing in. She also cleaned the kitchen at our condo every day, twice per day. The week before we left she came and cleaned our house several times so I could focus on the enormous task of packing clothes, skis, gear, etc. for 9 people - plus food for an entire week.
It is evident that we could not have had this wonderful family time without the help of so many. It is encouraging to see how blessed we really are. Family and friends around us are essential to this life. THANK YOU!!!
To see photos and video of our trip look me up on Facebook.
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